LEWISHAM, London

Here's a couple of quotes from the posters currently dotted around my house in Lewisham South East London:
"To flush the toilet please use a bucket of water." (The bucket is down the corridor in the shower room)
"In case of an odour please always open the window and use the air spray"
"I have connected the internet but there is a problem with the provider I will call them on June 12th to fix this issue."
"A small plastic casing- such as is used for film- has been found in the washing machine. That is why there is peices of film found in the wash. My friend James has cleaned the down pipe and now it will work."
"I don't know who you think you are, but after our ugly incident this morning, I have contacted my lawyers who will be sending a summons to the address of your university."
It's all just part of the campaign of insanity started by my drunk landlord who just moved himself in to the room that was mysteriously vacant when I cam eback from Bergen.
Actually it’s not all new, some of it has been going on for a while. As well as being drunk and a racist he’s been starting all manner of home improvements. He’s added a ceramic wash basin and bathroom cupboards to the outside of the house. Only a man on the boundary of genius and insanity could think of such a thing.
The other thing he’s done outside is construct a small enclosed area that takes up a ridiculous proportion of the garden (the rest of which is filled with crap.) I’ve done an ariel diagram as a visual aid:

BUT! It doesn’t matter because I’m moving out on the 1st of August into our new place (me and Camilla) it’s in Islington and is much better here is another visual aide:

I was in Norway last weekend that was awesome. I helped my friend and his fiance save a Seagull (hopefully anyway) they left in a box on the floor by some office buildings. That might not sound great but they did put up with it in their apartment for a whole sleepless night. It’s probably still alive joseph. Probably.
Actually as it escaped into the cat infested miniature shrubberies surrounding the office buildings- It did make me believe in the link between dinosaurs and birds. So it’s potential death at their hands is offset slightly by the slight increase in my knowledge. Cheers all around.
Norway was also awesome because of the weather and the barbeques and the bacon and cheese hot dogs and the attitude, style, coffee, food, and company. It was awesome. Thanks again Bergen for giving me so many good memories.
Back in London now and desperately waiting to get away from the mouse poo in this kitchen and into the roof terrace flat in Islington in Camilla.
Living the dream!
Peace out.